How do criminal defense attorneys sleep at night?
Have you ever wondered how criminal defense attorneys sleep at night? After all, they are constantly surrounded by criminals and darkness. Not to mention, they normally must defend the indefensible on a daily basis. HOW DO THEY DO IT??
Here are a few theories:
1. They have no soul. 💥 This is the most popular theory amongst prosecutor offices across the country. The idea is that criminal defense attorneys have sold their soul to the devil in exchange for being able to defend criminals. But, as we all know, the devil is a liar and has probably stolen their soul anyway. Or maybe they don’t have a soul to begin with! That would certainly explain a lot.
2. They are actually criminals themselves. ✔ This theory gained some traction after it was revealed that several high-profile defense attorneys had past run-ins with the law. But, then again, maybe they just have really good experiences with the criminal justice system and know how to work it to their advantage. Or maybe they’re just really good at faking it! Who knows?
3. They’re just really good liars. 💯Criminal defense attorneys have honed the art of deception to professional levels. It is almost as if they operate in a world where “truth” and “lying” are relative terms – it’s an essential part of their job description. They have to be able to look their clients in the eye and tell them that they believe in their innocence, even when they know they’re guilty as sin. It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it! And, at the end of the day, these lawyers probably go home and tell themselves a few lies so they can sleep at night.
So, there you have it! Three theories explaining how criminal defense attorneys sleep at night. Do you have any other theories? We’d love to hear them in the comments!
Author: Sal Aniano
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